Self doubt

Sometimes I find myself questioning myself. I find myself doubting me.
At times,when I see a new follower for my blog, I wonder why? I wonder if I’m truly all that. Do I actually have stuff worth reading?
Times,people come and share stuff with me and I wonder, ‘who do they think I am?’ I question my legitimacy.This could stem from the fact that I am not perfect,but have suffered from the perfection syndrome.Questions always flowing.
When trusted with a responsibility,at times I wonder what my boss or whoever else is smoking.What makes them think I can pull it off? I self sabotage a lot of times by selling myself short and settling for the status quo;afraid that maybe I am not deserving…
Sometimes,that feeling of inadequacy creeps in like a thief and it robs me of my peace of mind. Most times,I will dance to the tune it plays and feel bad about me.
But then,I thank God for him and for my support group aka my friends,who will not allow me to stay down,even though I beg them. I thank God for the young people I mentor who remind me that I am making a difference in my own small way. I am grateful for the people who read my blog and comment and those who go ahead and follow me.They remind me that I actually do make sense,enough for them to want to read from me again.I am grateful for those who keep challenging me to go to greater heights even if I don’t think I am capable of it.
I love that no man is an island,because I don’t think I would have been able to survive,without the support of everyone who is a part of my life.
And as for my writing and blogging,I need to remember not to do it so that I get more followers or recognition;for then I will not be true to the words in me that seek to be let out and read. I will continue writing,that which is in me because I am but a slave to the words and I ought to do their bidding.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s