times we say things without thinking.actually that is what we do most of the times as human beings. we react to circumstances instead of act. we think too highly of ourselves and have little or no room at all for other people. there is a blog i follow called the daily love and if nothing else,one thing i read that has stuck on me is,before you seek to be understood,understand.of course this calls for us keeping off our selfishness.it calls for us to think of another before ourselves,no wonder they say,if you conquer yourself,you will have won the greatest of all battles.and it’s also true that it is easier said than done. it is easier for us for us to preach water and take wine.it takes a lot from an individual to go that extra mile,which i have come to learn is always worth it.
i hurt someone i love with words i spoke because i did not care to think first.to think of the implications of what i was thinking of saying.i felt like i had been attacked and so i was on the defensive.the other thing,we always are ready for war.someone says something,no matter how innocent,we come out all guns blaring and ready for war and then after the damage is done….and now i think about it and i realize i did not have to say some of the things i said. as i learned in my PR class, communication is considered a success,only when the receiver understands the message as it was intended.if they misunderstand it,communication definitely did not take place.and that’s what happened in my case.i meant one thing,he heard something different and now we are in cold war if you may…
they say if you repeat a mistake twice,then you are a fool or something like that. i am learning from this mistake and it made me realize just how much i love this person.i do not want to hurt him.i want to be the reason behind his smile…i hope i will get a second chance…anyway,back to my lessons.i am learning it is indeed better to give than to receive;better to be kind than to be right. i am but 25 years of age and some may think i am still too young but i have come to agree that age aint noting but a number as growing old is mandatory but growing up,that is optional.i have gone through quite a number of experiences and learning from them have left me a better person i believe.i know how to admit when i am wrong and apologize for it without necessarily feeling like a lesser being.i have learned that gossip really is a waste of time and it takes you to the league of the person you are talking down on.i have learned that life has seasons and each season has a reason and that it is important to know when the season comes to an end,lest you miss the magic of the new one.let go of the past,no matter how good or bad.give the present a chance to create new memories;they are always there for us to catch.
i have learned that true love desires the best for others,even if it means seeing that person with another.when you love someone,you do not want them to hurt,and sadly,times we are the poison to those we love.love is full of sacrifices.when you compromise on something you would rather not,you are telling the other person,i care enough;you are important.you know,when something matters to you because it is important to the person you love?and who knows, you may end up enjoying it and you become a fan as well.i have learned that someone who claims to love you yet continually hurts you,does not actually love you.it may be something else,just not love.i have learned that you cannot make someone love you.it is an independent decision.no matter how awesome a person you are to them,if they do not love you,they will still treat you like crap,so do not waste yourself praying for the day a revolution will take place in their hearts.oh,yo actually can pray for it,as you move on with your life,isn’t there a quote that says,love happens when we are busy doing other things?
i have learned the beauty and importance of friendship.i have learned that every friend indeed is a flower that brightens my life with their own individual scents.true friendship,i believe,allows you to make mistakes,to be you without reservations.true friendship cares.i have learned that life really is simple and if you live it simply,you will have more reasons to smile.do not read too much into situations.treat every situation separately;do not join dots,you always somehow end up with the wrong image.take one day at a time;one step at a time.do not be in a rush as everything that is meant for you,will come to pass.stop and smell the roses and enjoy the warmth of the morning sun.
love is the greatest of all gifts.it drives us insane yet we cannot do without it.we pretend we can.we turn our hearts to ice and lock the door and throw away the keys but deep down,we all always want it.to love and to be loved.if you find someone you love and who loves you back,treasure that.it is not an everyday thing.and put them first.think of them first.before you do or say something,think of them and how it will affect them.know the saying what goes around comes around,you will be happy at the end of it.both of you will be happy.don’t get tired of being the bigger person.don’t get tired of apologizing even when you are not wrong.you know better,so love better and it will surely come back to you.and even if it doesn’t,choose to always be the nice one.let everyone else always be in debt of your kindness and niceness.never tire of doing good things.
hun,if you happen to read this,i am truly sorry and i hope you will be able to forgive me.love you.
xoxo.
Miss Adoyo 