one of those super long days but im glad iv finished what i was to do… so now,it hit me how someone i chose to forgive still bothers me so much.everytime i see him,i feel the pain afresh and it is quite annoying.I want to move on like yesterday but i guess my heart has other plans. Or rather, you cannot hasten the healing process,so i have decided i won’t rush it. but journal, today the tears will flow.i have decided i will let them just flow and not bother them the least bit.see i do not like crying over people who have hurt me because that is usually like my burial for them.once you cost me my tears,we can never be the same again.yet my soul says that it needs me to off load; to unburden it of the pain it has bottling inside,and tonight Journal,i shall grant it its request and let the tears flow.
the beauty about tears is that it leaves me feeling like a new day.Know the way it clears after the rains?i kinda have the same feeling.i kinda feeling like a burden has literally been taken from me and its beautiful.i love crying;the crying with a purpose.and usually it’s when i need to let go.it somehow gives me the strength to move on so,it’s a date with my tears tonight.
tears.letting go.Miss Paula left. she was my mentee and so much full of life but she passed on two months ago.I was broken.Remembering her dreams,her person,it just hurt so much and i held on to her.after i got the news,i held on;not wanting to believe what i was hearing;i held on until this Sunday I was at the front as i am in the praise and worship team,and a certain song played,and the floods were opened.I broke down.I cried and cried and cried and after that,i was able to smile.I miss her but she was such a beautiful someone that though she is gone,thinking of her just makes me smile.Love you small siz.
I will catch up with you tomorrow…