Dear Past,
I write this letter to you with so much mixed emotions. Honestly, you have been a part of me for such a long time that I ended up thinking you are me. You somehow made it to my identity and that is when everything started going downhill.
I shall not deny you the credibility that you have been a loyal friend and companion. You have been by my side, so much so that I became dependent on you. I thought that if you were to leave me,I would be crippled.Now,unfortunately,your loyalty has been affecting my present.The two of you seem to have some beef from a while back;I can’t say for certain but the two of you cannot see eye to eye, neither can you stay in one place together.And so,I always I’m the referee or the one who breaks the tie, and somehow I have always chosen you. Maybe it’s because you I already know.Because as your name suggests,you have already happend.
You are actually very sharp.You have a way of keeping the bad and ugly alive and somehow causing the good thoughts float away.You always remind me of my dark days.The tears I have shed.The hurt feelings.Those are your favorite topics.Every time the present brings something up that I am not sure how I am supposed to handle,you take me back to a time where something similar happened and what the result was and as per your reputation,it’s not something positive and so I end up pushing the present away.I end up letting the present slip away and I coil into that cocoon of fear of what happened repeating itself and silently and sadly,I shun the present away.I have let go of amazing opportunities because of you past.Because I let you convince me that you are actually protecting me.That you are keeping me from getting hurt again or disappointed again.And for the longest time,I have let you run the show.NOT ANYMORE!
I have woken up to reality and you past,are a good servant but a terrible master.You are a great teacher,if one decides to learn from you but a totally wrong mentor.For you mentor people to hold on to things that happened and influence them to not let go and move on.You keep us in a stagnant place.You encourage us to let go of opportunities that will free us from you and hence grant us true freedom.You keep us prisoners in your own dungeon with fake illusion.You make us think that being the victim always is a good thing but you know what,it is not at all cool.Others actually get tired of you and they start avoiding you because in your world,you are always a victim.You never take up responsibility because you blame everything on the past;on you.
This actually is goodbye.You have crippled me long enough.You have stolen lots of opportunities from me because you have kept me living in fear,of you being repeated.So, Past,i let you go.I will deal with the present as it comes.I will take risks and take responsibility of the choices I make.I know you have my back,in terms of I can always blame you when things don’t work out but no more.I think I am ready to be weaned from you.I am ready to grow up and face the world on my own.Thank you for your friendship,that has mainly robbed me of great opportunities.For once,I say goodbye with a smile.For once,goodbye is not saddening but actually freeing.
Good bye Past.
Miss Adoyo 