free…at last

I have played by your rules

for far too long

I have let you

Decide what goes

without much consideration

to what i think or feel

you have been my yard stick

measuring myself against you

feeling like a failure,

as i never did measure up

you do see my tears

but you maintain

a state of oblivion

you know just how much

your approval would mean to me

and selfishly you deny me

my hurts and pains

seem to be an afrodisiac to you;

you thrive on them

i have allowed you

to cripple me

by letting myself believe

i am nothing without you.

if this is what it costs

to have you in my life,

i’m afraid you’ll be forced

to quit or resign

for truth be told

i am bankrupt

you have taken from me

every emotion i ever had

i have nothing more to lose

so i’ll take back the power

i entrusted you with

only for you to misuse it

i will altogether stop caring,

about what you think or don’t think

i will go on my way…

i may be pathetic to you

but God must have had

a good reason

for taking time

to come up with me

otherwise i’d never have  happened

so i will find out from Him,

if only but one reason

why he created me

i’ll sit by his feet

listen to his voice

trying to find out

a thing or two,

why he lets me

walk on his earth.

i don’t know

what his reason will be

not sure if there’ll be much

but thanks to you

disappointment is a friend of mine

after you,

i doubt i can ever be bothered

by it

so watch me leave

even if it means crawling

watch me do it.

today i divorce myself

from you

today i cast you to my past…

hope you had fun,

while your reign of pain lasted

for i cried my last tear yesterday

and never again

will i allow you

to dictate

anything about me or my life.

Au revoir

and see you when i cannot

avoid it…..


10 thoughts on “free…at last

  1. Definitely imagine that which you stated. Your favorite reason seemed to be at the internet the easiest thing to be aware of. I say to you, I definitely get irked while people consider issues that they plainly do not understand about. You managed to hit the nail upon the highest as neatly as defined out the entire thing without having side effect , people could take a signal. Will likely be back to get more. Thanks!

  2. Tim, are like my top commentor……Miss DR, i appreciate the kind words, thank you for stopping by …Baraka,ero kamano nyar mama. thanks for reading my work and yes empowerment Miss DR,is one of my strong points.interestingly,i wrote this poem on my phone while at the bus comes from a deep place in me….coz it is about me….

  3. This is stunning. Seriously, words cannot describe how perfect this poem is. The subject, the cadence, the power. Love. ^_^

    • thank you ms. adollyciousirony ( would like to know how you got around to that name?) i wrote it yesterday while at the bus stop,and it is actually inspired by myself and i just wanna get rid of all the pressure to be the way so and so thinks i should and all.i know a lot of us keep up with some pathetic situations because we do not know any better but the moment you find a better way,i say,spread your wings and fly away.
      thank you for stopping by. 😉

      • 🙂 Yes spread your wings and just freely fly away….
        “adollyciousirony” actually the words came from – a delicious irony, a slang words which means “delightful” and my name is Dolly, so that explained it, hahahha
        and it’s my pleasure to visit your page. 🙂

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